Maladies of a Black Girl on a Diet

Sorry I don't have a pretty picture today. You aren't here for the pretty pictures, are you? I'm also sorry about the typos. This is not ever going to be the perfectly copyedited blog.

I’d be lying if I told you I didn't have rough moments over the past three weeks. Tired, angry, frustrated moments. I’m most surprised that I rarely (twice that I can think of) have hungry moments. I thought that would be my biggest complaint. My youngest child woke up at 4:45 a.m. this morning, so I figure today is as good of a day as any to vent. Some things that irritate me about changing my life:

• The number of plastic containers I now have to wash, or run through the dishwasher each night. Packing my lunch everyday means lots of plastic containers.
• My arm fat. I hate it so much I can't even talk about it.
• I don’t like coffee, but when I do drink coffee I like lots of milk in it. Having being up since the butt-crack of dawn, I’ve had today 1) a cup of half caf (half decaf and half regular coffee) and 2) cup of decaf coffee. Due to the volume of milk I like, both cups equaled a whooping 120 calories. But ya’ll coffee just doesn’t taste that good to me without the milk in it. I could have eaten a ton of other things for those 120 stinking calories.
• When I do a set stair (6 flights to the top) at work, I get a little heated. It is not cool to feel sweaty in my work clothes.
• My hair is a sweaty mess. Black girls don’t like getting sweaty or prefer to only get sweaty at appropriate intervals. All the sweating is ruining my do, and you know I can only get it did so often. I’m trying to extra condition my hair, but right now all the sweat is like a saltwater bath every day.
• Sweat acne. I don’t know if this is real or if I just made it up. But I have self-diagnosed myself with this condition!
• My house is a disaster area. Ok, my house was often a disaster area before the fitness kick, but in addition to 13 Barbie Dolls and 500 Thomas the Train pieces, I’ve got 2 yoga mats, 8 risers, 2 benches, various weights between 5 and 15 lbs, and a 27 lb barbell cluttering in my family room. I don’t really need a bigger house. I need kids and cat to live in a tent in the backyard and forage for food.
• My current yoga practice is a great source of amusement for the masses. When yoga starts, the kids and cat emerge from the woodwork like zombies. The girls (5 and 3) are older and pretty good at yoga because they’ve been watching us for years. But the boy and the cat . . . they treat me like a piece of furniture during yoga. Nothing like cat fur in your mouth or a hug from a 2 year old when you are trying to Chaturanga Dandasana
• The haters (I will go into greater detail on them in a future blog) and the “I can’ts.” “I can’t do what you’re doing.” Yeah well, neither can I, but I’m doing it anyway. I’m not telling anyone to do what I am doing. Maybe I watch too much LOST. “Don’t tell me what I can’t do!” If it works for John Locke it can work for me, double namaste. (Another blog is forthcoming on all the reasons why I “can’t” do this)
• My biggest complaint: I feel like I shouldn’t complain!

Weird weight loss tip.
Grunt. I did a lot of grunting last night in kickboxing class. I know there's a tennis chick who got into a lot of trouble for the noise she makes. I'm guessing each grunt is worth a good 1-2 calories. My favorite part of last night’s class is when the instructor stood between a student and the body bag and made the student kick and punch him. My second favorite part is when upon seeing my form, he burst into hysterically laughter.

Another weird weight loss tip. Hysterical laughter. Good for at least 5-7 calories burned. Happy eating and exercising.

Tuesday Exercise Journal
30 minute walk
18 flights of stairs
1 hour kickboxing

Tuesday Food Journal
060 - Coffee
100 - Banana
035 - Kashi
055 - Plain Yogurt
350 - Tuna sandwich
035 - Cheese (Laughing Cow Light)
100 - Cherries
070 - Nuts
165 - 1/2 Salmon Salad Whole Foods
300 - Sushi
030 - 1 Bite of most delicious sugar cookie from Whole Foods